on how it feels to be HIRED (!!)

Being hired sort of feels like:

1. Asking for a pony for Christmas your entire life and then getting one

2. Discovering that you can actually buy Girl Scout Cookies all year long (!!!)

3. Hitting a home-run while every single person you know is watching

4. Skipping school to go to Disneyland

5. Getting your acceptance letter to Hogwarts

YOU GUYS. I got a job.
It's been quiet around here for the last few weeks because I've been busy trying to wrap my brain around the fact that this actually happened. (I'm still waiting for someone to jump out and yell APRIL FOOLS! because this really does feel too good to be true.) I haven't done the best job of explaining what exactly I've been doing here these past few months, so let me explain How I Managed To Move To New York Without A Job, And Then Get A Job (Three Months Later).

While I didn't have much in the way of a plan, the one thing I did know when I moved to New York was that I wanted to start a career somewhere in the land of Marketing + Event Production. …..aaaand that's pretty much the only thing I knew. See, the tricky thing about moving to a city where you don't know anyone is, you don't know anyone. So where do you start? Who do you talk to? What do you do? I remember being on the plane from Oregon to New York, having visions of myself roaming through the city like a door-to-door salesman, knocking on every door and asking for work.

Thanks to my friends and family, I didn't have to knock on doors.
The #1 reason I've had any success here is because I've had lots of people looking out for me. People connecting me with anyone they know in the city (old college buddies, business partners, friends-of-a-friend). People keeping an eye out for any potential job opportunities. People going out of their way to introduce me to someone-who-might-know-someone-in-the-industry. I'm telling you, I have never felt more grateful for my family and friends than I have these past three months.

One of these introductions led to the best internship I've ever had (enter, reason #2).
If there's one piece of advice I could give to anyone who's looking for a job or wondering how to kickstart The Career You've Always Wanted, let this be it: Never underestimate the power of The Unpaid Internship. While I might not have a paycheck to show for it, I spent the last 3 months working alongside some of the most creative and passionate people I've ever met. I got to see parts of the city that I never would have had access to otherwise - rooftops, private balconies, photo shoots, grand openings, launch parties, the 44th floor, the behind-the-scenes. The experience I gained and the people I met through my internship are, without a doubt, the reason I got my job.

And best of all? It's a job that I really want.

Can I get a HALLELUJAH?!?!!

how to: live in new york city without a job

While I have your attention, I would like to take a few minutes to thank a very rare, very select group of people. A group so exclusive - so magical - that spotting one of them is like spotting a unicorn, or Platform 9 and 3/4.

They are, People Who Tip Their Baristas.

People Who Tip Their Baristas are the reason I've been able to live in New York City for the past two months without a job. I mean it. In case you've been wondering what my secret trust fund looks like, let me tell you. It looks like a 12oz mason jar stuffed with 2-years worth of coffee shop tips. Can you say, jackpot? Minus a couple loads of laundry and a few late-night ice cream runs (i.e. life or death situations), every extra penny I made making lattes and cappuccinos went into that jar.

To me, People Who Tip Their Baristas are on the same level of holiness/heroic-ness as Mother Theresa, Gandhi, The Incredibles, and Meryl Streep. Straight up angels is what they are. If you've ever found yourself standing in line at your neighborhood café wondering, Do I really need to give this person a whole extra dollar? All they did was pour my coffee and smile at me! This isn't brain surgery! Anyone could do that! Then, let me stop you right there. On behalf of all baristas everywhere, allow me to set the record straight:

You need to tip your barista. Okay?
For one thing, if you don't tip them, they will remember you. Mark my words! You will forever be known as The Guy Who Doesn't Tip. And while it may not be brain surgery, it takes a very special kind of person to pour 300 cups of coffee a day and smile at every cranky, impatient, "mochaccino" drinking son of a bitch that walks through the door. If you really need to justify forking over an entire extra dollar, consider this: Your barista controls your coffee. You never know when you might get decaf by accident.

Am I getting side tracked?

Here's what my girl Mindy Kaling remembers about being unemployed in New York City:

The greatest source of my stress was that it had been three months since I'd moved to New York and I still didn't have a job. You know those books called "From Homeless to Harvard" or "From Jail to Yale" or "From Skid Row to Skidmore"? They're these inspirational memoirs about young people overcoming the bleakest of circumstances and going on to succeed in college. I was worried I would be the subject of a reverse kind of book: a pathetic tale of a girl with a great education who frittered it away watching syndicated Law & Order episodes on a sofa in Brooklyn. From Dartmouth to Dickhead it would be called. I needed a job.

My story is pretty much the same, give or take a few minor details.
For instance, my book would be called From Bachelor's Degree to The Bachelorette - a collection of short stories about a girl with a great education who frittered it away watching back-to-back episodes of House of Cards and eating Chinese take-out. Or maybe, From Starry-eyed to Sing-Sing (who knows what could happen?).

And so. The job hunt marches on! And I march with it.
In the meantime, I can go on living indoors and eating Chinese take-out thanks to the greatest unsung heroes of our time.

To all the People Who Tip Their Baristas, thank you.