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heather vs. summer

Monday, June 16, 2014


It's time for me to get something off my chest that I've been bottling up for over 20 years (that's right - years!). Are you ready for this? Here it is: Summer is my least favorite season. 


While you let that sink in, I think I'll unload A Few (more) Of My Least Favorite Things that everyone else seems to love (I recommend reading this list out loud to the tune of this song):
  • children
  • Tom Cruise
  • bacon
  • leather pants
  • going to the gym before work
  • going to the gym after work
  • small dogs
  • The World Cup
  • white sunglasses
  • ginger-flavored-anything
  • Taylor Swift
  • voicemails
Phew. I feel so much better. Don't you? 
Lately, I've been spending a disturbing amount of time pretending to be excited about warm weather. People are straight up giddy about it (and I don't use that word lightly). When it gets to that inevitable, awkward point in the conversation when I'm supposed to chime in about how 85-degree weather makes me want to dance on the nearest tabletop, I usually just smile and run away. 


What can I say? Hot weather has never done it for me.
Being a native-Californian, this might surprise you (but maybe you're forgetting the part where I moved to Oregon? That decision was based on more than just my love for recycling and sautéed kale). 

I think the worst day of my entire life happened when I was 8 years old - at the time, my family lived in central California and mid-July was no f-ing joke. It was 128 degrees outside (ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY EIGHT) and in a desperate attempt to keep my brother and I from swan diving off the roof of our house, my mom took us to Baskin Robbins to cool down. I strategically went with Mint Chocolate Chip (over my usual Prailines & Cream) because everyone knows that mint ice cream is always (mysteriously) colder than the other flavors. I really thought I had Summer outsmarted with that move, but nevertheless, our scoops melted roughly 0.12 seconds after we stepped outside. I think all three of us cried right there in the parking lot. It was just. too. hot. 



Fourteen years later, I'm still traumatized - and New York isn't exactly helping me out. 


Nothing gives me nightmares quite like the thought of NYC in the summertime. Dry California heat was one thing, but 90% humidity is an entirely different beast. I'm still trying to wrap my brain around what 90% humidity even feels like. Why do people go outside? How can anyone stand to constantly be sweaty and sticky and wet? How many showers should I plan on taking every day? How am I supposed to get to work in the morning - after a hot, smelly subway ride - without looking like I spent the last 45 minutes in a sauna? I have so many questions. 

Summer and I will never be friends. I don't even like wearing shorts! If I had it my way, life would be a perpetual 55 degrees with a nice afternoon thunderstorm. Wouldn't you pick a pumpkin-spiced latte over a lemonade? Come on. I can't be the only one who would rather wear a scarf  than a sundress (can I?).

October really can't get here fast enough. 

12 comments:

  1. I completely agree!!! I really prefer cooler weather; no frizzy hair or ruining my clothes with sweat stains.

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  2. Lady, I hear you. I HATE hot weather. I'm just not made for it. I live in (and grew up in) Portland and the past few summers have not been what I'm used to. Fall is my true love...

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  3. A-men. I've been dreading the summer ever since the last polar vortex. Humidity + heat is a cruel, cruel joke.

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  4. Haha I love all of this.

    I love Summer but only when I'm prepared for it. I like being at beach with my swimming costume on and lotion and book and towel but I HATE being stuck on a crowded train in 90% humidity with leather seats and short skirts and sweat patches everywhere. It is actually the worst.

    Sydney is very humid and so I feel your pain. I do much prefer Spring weather where I can hang out in a skirt and top and enjoy the sun but also can throw on a cardigan when the evening breeze kicks in. Perfect weather in my books

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  5. haha this is so me! Glad to know I'm not the only one out there. Here's wishing you a cool, cloudy, and rainy Summer. :)

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  6. Haha, totally made me laugh, even though I like a few of your dislikes ;). In upper Michigan, our humidity is off the charts almost all of the time. I don't know what a warm day without sweating at least once even feels like...I know. I'm lucky enough to live minutes from freshwater lakes to cool off in - thank goodness. Tips: wear your hair up on hot days. You will most likely regret otherwise (I have long, thick hair..) Always have a ice-filled water bottle. Taking a break for iced coffee inside AC is imperative ;) and try to find shorts that you love and are effortless...makes the world of a difference (or dresses!). I'm excited to read more about the city...dying to visit. Maybe I'll wait for fall aka sweaters and pumpkin spice ha xoxo

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    1. Thank you for the great tips! My hair is being thrown into a bun the minute I'm done typing ;) I need to find a good pair of shorts, for sure. I moved to New York with all-winter clothes and I really can't put off a shopping trip any longer. 90 degrees in jeans is *not* a fun experience.

      You have to visit New York! I highly recommend coming in the fall.

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  7. I think I'm discovering that temperature preference occurs in inverse to wherever you grew up. You're from California and therefore, you're totally over the hot weather. Meanwhile I'm from Minnesota and I'm supposed to tough it out against the cold but in reality, I wish I could live in perpetual 80 degrees. So, I hear you.

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  8. I love summer, but I totally understand. :)

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  9. I hate summer, too. We should start a summertime hate club.

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  10. I have never been big on summer either. I love the long days, but the heat. THE HEAT. Save me!

    Lucky it is freeeezing down here in Oz today. Drinking all the hot chocolate! Not to make you jealous or anything...

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  11. haha funny! i have always been a winter baby but all the sudden this year i love summer. good luck!

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